Friday, April 01, 2011


You can't imagine how it feels to walk in someone else's shoes until you've done it.

Me? I'm learning a painful lesson. A widow's shoes are torturous, and the journey is difficult beyond words.

In the midst of my new circumstances, however, come invaluable pearls of comfort and wisdom. Their source? Other women who have worn these shoes and lived to tell the tale. Margaret, who is so wonderfully kind and reassuring, telling me that in time I will feel better. I know she is right, and hold her in such high esteem that I keep her words near to my heart. My husband's widowed aunts reassure me that I will survive this--even though it feels like I might not. They are all fabulous ladies who live productive lives after their husbands' passings, so I believe them. They wouldn't steer me wrong.

Yesterday one of my favorite people repeated what she's been telling me for the past thirteen weeks. Aunt Vicki reminds me, "Stay strong. Keep busy." Brilliant lady. Always has been.

Stay strong. Keep busy.

Simple, this new truth. It will be my salvation, I think.

The weather here has been near frigid, but with some almost sunny spots, so I've spent many hours outdoors this week. I'm reclaiming our neglected flower beds, raking debris from last year and hauling tons of leaves to the compost pile. Staying strong. Keeping busy. It is a blessing to rediscover sprouting bulbs we planted, to see the first red shoots of peonies and watch buds on Vito's fruit trees grow plump.

As this ridiculous April Fool's snow started falling in the early hours this morning, I worked at my sewing machine. Sleep eluded me, but I kept busy making padded cases for iPads. Want to see?

Sorry to have disappeared for a week. I hope that as time passes life will become more peaceful. I have no illusions about my new shoes. I know they will always hurt but I pray each step will eventually become less painful.

On a cheery note, today is Aunt Vicki's birthday! My husband adored his aunt, as I do, so please send a kind thought her way today. She is a grand lady, and I hope we share many more birthdays with her.

Happy Birthday Aunt Vicki! I love you!


Dru said...

Glad to see you. Was concerned but happy to know you're okay.

Happy Birthday to your Aunt Vicki!

Sarita said...

Thank you, Dru. I'm hanging in, one day at a time.

Thanks for wishing Aunt Vicki well. She is such a special lady, and very well loved.

Hope your weekend is peaceful.

Anonymous said...

Be kind to yourself, Sarita. Vito was an amazing man so its no surprise you miss him so much. You have good counsel.

Love you!!!

Sue W.

Melissa McClone said...

Good to hear from you! And so nice to hear you have support and wise words to get you through this rough time. Hope Aunt Vicki has an awesome birthday!