Just Another Day

Oh, yeah, I'm back home. The lunacy continues here in the middle of nowhere.

A moment from yesterday morning? Sure, I'll share that with you.

Hold on tight to your coffee mugs, friends. And, don't say I didn't warn you.

It snowed here. And was still snowing yesterday morning while I was in the hot tub, which is in its own little building. Private. Peaceful. All good.

Yesterday when I went to the hot tub I grabbed a pair of jeans and sweatshirt off the pile of folded laundry as I passed. Divine intervention, I think. Anyhow, I had more than just my short blue robe with me when I headed out.

Good thing, that.

So there I am. Drinking coffee. Watching steam rise off the water. Plotting the day's chapters in my mind.

The roar of an engine breaks into my peaceful time. I hear noise. The doorbell on the house rings. Me? I hunker down in the water and hold my breath. Then, heavy footsteps on the deck. A knock on the door.

Crap.

"Yes?"

"Fed Ex, ma'am. Package for you."

"Uh, could you just leave it by the door? Thanks."

"I need a signature, ma'am."

Double crap.

Climbing from the water, dripping everywhere, I manage, "Ah, sure. Just...one....minute, okay?"

"Take your time, ma'am." I hear the laughter in his voice.

Of course, I'm glad I've got real clothes and tug the sweatshirt over my head. I jump into the jeans, wiggling my wet body into the dry denim. Not easy, take my word for it. Finally the jeans are up all the way.

Backwards.

Oh yes, I did. I put those jeans on backwards.

So I did what anyone would do. I pulled that sweatshirt down as far as I could, attempted a calm demeanor and opened the door. Signed the slip. Thanked the guy. Took the package.

But I know he saw my pants were on backwards. He totally saw it.

Yeah, I need another MHB. Bad.